This is probably one of the strangest posts I’ve written yet. I’ve been pondering how to go about an update for some time – yet I also don’t fully understand where I am with everything. But life has a funny way of unfurling (I love that word).
Let’s start at the beginning.
Most of you will be aware that 5 months ago my life took an unexpected U-turn. Long story short me and my husband separated, I moved house and I also started a brand new job too (well if your gonna do it don’t do it by halves!!) so you could say there has been some adjustments to my usual routine. Gardening and blogging were not at the forefront of my agenda.
I’m not going to go into the details of my separation as that’s not my style and it’s also not just my life I would be talking about too. I will say for the record, although it wasn’t at first a decision I agreed with, it was the best decision overall and I still remain on amicable terms with my husband and we’re both now much happier for it, which is all that matters.
So with such grand life changes I didn’t know what to do with my blog, allotments and garden. I don’t think I was in a position to make any rash decisions either, so I’ve let them all over-winter, which seemed the wisest choice. A good old winters rest should do us all a world of good.
Then there were silence!
I have been so busy looking after myself in health and mind and with all my new routines in a new village, job etc that I’ve not really had chance to think much on gardening. Then just as the days start to get a little longer and a little brighter I could feel my mind pondering as I’d walk past a pretty garden or get a whiff of the spring earth I could feel the urge in my little green fingers twitching. I did honestly try avoid it, I would look away casting it to one side as though gardening never interested me, or gaze in sadness of what I missed so deeply.
Some of you will be thinking well just crack on then, but it’s not that easy really. There are a lot of raw feelings still that surrounds me with gardening, it reminds me of people and pets and stuff and I created a wonderful garden which I’ve had to abandon, so I keep asking myself do I need these constant reminders?
I can’t run, I can only grow!
I can’t shut out my thoughts and feelings I need to address them, not supress them and we all know of the therapy tending to the earth provides, so I have chosen to start again!
Although it maybe another temporary space, it will still provide happiness and joy as well as countless other benefits and I really miss the bees, blooms and muck too much. As for my blog, I’m just going to go with the flow, with no promises or agenda. I miss all my virtual friends terribly and the fond chats and laughs we have. Everyone has always been super supportive towards me, but none so more than now. We have a truly wonderful community and all your lovely wishes, kindness and patience have been greatly appreciated.
So for now, this is where I’m at – I’m happy, I’m healthy and I’m sorta back!!
Oh sorry for the lack of pretty pictures, I’ll hit you up next time!!